Disconnection of Relationship in Couple Relationship or Family Relationship

According to the attachment theory of Daniel Siegel (The Mindful Brain, 2007), a cold and distant pair of parents created an emotionally isolated childhood which may have the long lasting effect on the adulthood. Without the attunement of emotion, the child is programmed to see things through the lens of left mode of processing, and slowly adapts into a culture of a deprived caring environment. The absence of emotional communication in the child's family has further deprived his right hemisphere from interactive nutrients and move his/her development toward the left hemisphere of logical and linear thinking under the sense of his/her internal world. As Decety and Chaminade (2003) affirm:

Our ability to represent one's own thoughts and represent another's thoughts are intimately tied together and have similar origins within the brain. Thus it makes sense that self-awareness, empathy, identification with other, and more generally, intersubjective processes, are largely dependent upon the right hemisphere resources, which are the first to develop.

With the insufficient of the right hemisphere emotional development, one may turn into rigidity for couple relationship. When it happens, the couple relationship may go strain. One is able to repair the impaired relationship by practicing mindfulness, a form of internal attunement which enables the brain to be flexible, reflective, receptive, self-observant, reflexive, COAL (curiosity, openness, acceptance, an love), COHERENCE ( Connection, openness, harmony, engagement, receptivity, emergence, noesis, compassion, and empathy, FACES (Flexible, adaptive, coherent, energized, and stable) (The mindful Brain, Siegel, 2007).

Mindful awareness promotes neural integration. One needs an integrated mind to stay a healthy life.